Things to ponder.

What is evil?

Is evil a physical thing, or something that was created? is it a entity that has always existed by its self and doesn't need any thing to exist ( Humans, devil etc ) Does it even exist? 

- My opinion:  Evil is the absence of God.   Its everything that isn't holy.   its the exact opposite image of God.  So is a real physical thing?  - Yes and no, but its not a created thing.   It's a choice rather or not to be like God: Righteous.   

Are all people Evil? Are you a sinner simply because you have a sin nature?  - what is a sin nature?  Where did it come from?  Have we always had one? 

All people aren't evil, because all people who have believed and act on their faith are redeemed by Christs blood.   Hence why we can have a relationship with God.   Because we have been redeemed.   if we hadn't we wouldn't be able too, because God is completely pure, justified and holy.   And God cannot dwell with evil.

No, not all people are sinners, yet. the bible says all have the ability\choice to be perfect.   But none will.   So, people aren't born inherently evil.   People are born pure and clean.  With a tendency to sin.   Once they make a choice to sin or not.   Is when they become a sinner or remain sinless (Jesus)   What is a sin nature?   A sin nature, is a nature\ tendency? to sin.   But it doesn't make us sinful.  Unless we act upon that nature.    Then we become a sinner.     My ultimate take on sin nature is the ability to see what good is and what evil is, and the ability to choose to do one or the other  - the sin nature comes in, in the fact that our nature is leaning towards the sin aspect.   Its not that we are destined to sin.   We still have the choice.   its just none after Jesus will choice to never sin. 

We didn't have a sin nature until Adam and Eve sinned.   -   if eating from the tree was a sin, and Adam and Eve knew so ( They knew God told them not too, and to not disobey God ) Then how did they not have the Knowledge of good and evil until after they sinned?  ....   I'd argue that they didn't have the Knowledge of evil - but had the Knowledge of good (God) hence why they had to be deceived to eat of the tree.     Once they made their choice: to sin.   Not only did they immediately know it was wrong, but they knew completely what wrong was,  and they knew shame.   So without sin, there is no shame.

Why did their choice to sin cause the rest of humanity to have a sin nature, and know the difference and be able to be tempted by the Devil.   And the Devil be able to have power over people who are not believers?

This is how I think about it.   Image our world today,  completely sinless, completely shameless and guiltless.    everyone is in perfect harmony with each other,  there is no hate (because hate is a sin) everyone is consumed with perfect pure love for another.  -  Now image that somewhere in the world\or heavens there is evil or rather the opposite of God.   (The devil, and all his followers)  Now, if people don't have the Knowledge of sin.   Or evil, or have the temptation to sin.   What hold\tempting could the devil possibly have over people?  - That's why it was so important to get us to have the Knowledge.  And once there was the Knowledge,   Not only will every person be tempted.   But that was when the first sin was done.   We know from the gospels that satan had no power over Jesus.    Because Jesus was perfect and holy.   So, he has no power over perfect and holy people.    Not only does he have no power but he really cant even do much.   So, my opinion is.  Once Adam and Eve sinned.   it unleashed the devil and his army to be able to ..tempt people.     I kinda think that before since people where perfect and holy he couldn't even do anything to them.   (why he had to deceive them first)  So once they sinned, and made the choice to take part in evil.   Evil existed in the earth.   And since evil existed satan had power.     Sadly for satan.   he still...just can't get the victory though.   :-)  


So, in essence evil is when we chose to sin.   Evil cannot exist in a perfect life.   -  Evil isn't physical evil is the result of people\angels choosing to be the opposite of God: satan, all the other fallen angels.  etc.     And No, God didn't create evil.   It wasn't created, it was chose to exist - by satan.   And was farthered on and unleashed by Adam and Eves decision.

...life..

. . . . . . . .

wait, falls already here?

Tomorrow I'm headed off to anchorage with my parents.  We're be getting back Sunday or Monday.  - Most likely Sunday though.  I'm all packed and have lots of yummy snacks prepared for the trip down - and back....if there's any left from the first time. ;)   Spicy  cracker\pretzel mix.  Orange hazel nut biscotti's.  And little coffee thins ( Like cookies.) We plan to do a bit of shopping.   going to the in-door water park.    I think my brother and his gf are coming down too.   And will be tagging along at the water park.   Which should be fun.  :)  I plan to check out all the kitchen stores I can.   Until my parents get sick of them. :-P    I have a few items that I'm really hoping I'll be able to find down there.  -  tupperwear...tupperwear....pampered chef...kitchen aid slicer....makeup... Then we are heading down to Seward.   Not sure exactly what all we are doing there.   I know some hiking and stuff though.   * :D *   I'm excited to see the "beach" and "ocean"   On the way back we are going to like my favorite place ever: McHugh state park.   Its right outside of Anchorage.   beautiful streams and waterfalls.   rocks, hills, trees.  Mmm.  :)    I think it'll be even more beautiful now, because its fall and all the leaves are turning and falling.  It'll be gorgeous!  -  I just down loaded a  bunch more music for the trip down.   So, I don't get to sick of my usual stuff and never want to listen to it again.   I've been trying to down load MSN messenger, and Gmail apps for my iPhone.   But my iTunes is silly and seems to think I'm entering my password incorrectly so not much luck with that. :-(   *drinks coffee*  Today,  I was offered a job taking care of kids for MOPS (mothers of preschoolers)  once a week -  Wednesdays.     I'd love too, waiting to hear the parental decision. :-p. I think that's all for now. 

I wonder if he knows hes all I think about at night. 

Summer time

Well,  As you can see it looks like this is going to be a winter\fall blog.   I'm either to busy or don't feel like being on the computer much right  now.   I might drop by from time to time in the summer time and post but prolly  not much.   - as of now, I just got back from church camp.    Made some new friends, and got closer to some I already had, had a really good week with God, and lots of fun.   And I'm utterly exhausted.   so, bye.

Leee's Home!!!! :) :) :)

Sooo... Lee got home the 7th at 9:30 in the evening.   I surprised him at the airport.  :) we where there for a little bit.   :)  then we all went home - and I came over the following morning.    We hung out for a bit.    I went with him his dad and Ben to the Fox Transfer station and watched them upload lots of spring cleaning junk.    Then we went back and Lee and I went for a nice long walk around the roads and through the trees.   Then returned again and cut his hair,  hung out some more with each other and Clara (my brothers girlfriend) and Ben. (boyfriends brother) Then we all:  Wyatt (Lees brother) Clara and Tim (my brother) Ben,  Lee and I.   And Lee's uncle, Frank.    Dropped Ben off at work.   Everyone went to Door of hopes saturday evening service.   Cept Lee and I.   We played on the play ground. :D  then we picked Ben back up.     we all went to pizza hut, and then saw iron man 2 and then they dropped me off at home... at almost 1.   hehe.   then sunday I went to church was picked up from church by the Perso'n's  then we went back to their house for a bit then went to the Williams  (friends of ours ) House, to celebrate mothers day.  -  there we did great stuff, like go on walks, ...swing.. watch lots of Dave's snowmachine movies, talked, ate great food.   watched and played with goats,  two of which being the most adorable little baby white goats ever.. and even got to feed them with a bottle. :P:)   we all went back home and watched the princess bride again. :) then I was picked up went home and sleeeept.   :)  so that was my weekend.    And today!  I'll be doing my usual stuff ( its chilly outside :( ) and making dinner and having Lee over.   I'm making my version of "chicken cacciatore" ( which is actually completely different then chicken cacciatore but w\e. :P) 

Grilled chicken! :)

  

tonight for dinner I made grilled chicken, with olive oil  some herbs and spices.  it was very very amazing pretty much my most favorite grilled chicken I've ever had. :)  not sure why it was so good maybe the long winter that involved having no grilled foods.. and I just love the "grilled flavor" its amazing - I made corn bread, grilled onions and potatoes with oil and seasoning, desert bread and mac n' cheese to go with those.    Very satisfying.   

Pesto Turkey Wraps

I went to Gollivers books the other day.   Looking for a favorite book I'd read the other day.   And bought a turkey pesto wrap with some veggies on it and really liked it.   So I made them for dinner Friday night.  :) 


1 Tortilla wrap
5 Cucumber slices
2 Large intact turkey deli meat slices
2 Slices of your favorite cheese ( I'd suggest provolone or Montery jack )
2 Large pieces of head lectus
4 tbs pesto
2 tbs chopped purple onions


lay your wrap out,  cover one half of the wrap in pesto.   lay on pesto:  Cheese, Turkey, Lectus, cucumbers then onions.  Fold ends\sides over to middle of wrap,  roll wrap up.   - 

Or you can put your wrap in the oven with the cheese  and let it melt then put everything on starting with the pesto going to the onions in order.  - but  I'd suggest wrapping your wrap in ten foil.  Or it'll dry out and become difficult to roll up.  


Pesto recipe:

2 cups very finely shredded almonds
3/4 cup olive oil
2 tsp kosher salt
1 cup shredded basil
pinch of black pepper
1/2 cup parmesan cheese. 
2 small garlic cloves finely minced.  

Mix well.    Blend after you mix.   til smooth.  

spiced, chocolate pecan cookies.

Here is a "made up" cookie recipe.    They're sorta based off of something else.. but not really so. :P They are amazing!! :) I made them for my discipleship group.



Mix in a bowl:

2 1/2 cup all purpose flour
1 1/2 tsp ground cinnamon
1 tsp ground ginger
1 tsp nutmeg (mmmm)
1/2 kosher salt
1/4 baking soda
1/4 ground all spice
1/4 black pepper
1/2 cup milk chocolate chips - chopped finely.

 ---- mix all that together ( You can even sift it together if you want )

In another bowl and wisk, or stand mixer add:
3/4 butter at room temp beat for a few minutes til light and fluffy.
add:1 1/2 packed brown sugar   - beat until creamed.    Then add:

1 tbs brown rice syrup
1 egg
1 egg yoke
1 tsp pure vanilla extract

-  Add to dry ingredients.   

- Other ingredients\for later:
1 egg
3 tbs water
1 cup finely chopped walnuts ( Dont add that yet )

Place on plastic wrap,  shape in to a roll.    freeze for 25 minutes.   ( Or less if your freezer is epic )
afterwords slice in to 1/2 " thick flatten a bit to 1/4 " thick.   -  Beat 1 egg with 3 tbs water.    Roll each cookie through  finely chopped pecans.   Place on parchment paper,  bake at 350º for 12-14 minutes.  O or until lightly firm and tooth pick inserted in middle comes out clean.   

-  Taste amazing with cold milk. :)

Muffins! Muffins! Lots of Muffins!!

  I'm making muffins for something I'm going too,  So I tried this recipe out to see how it turned out before I made them for the event.   -  They're a good base,   but.. They need more flavor.   I'm not going to post the recipe because it needs some changes done to it,    Less of that,  more of this, some of that etc.   Once I get done perfecting it.   I will post it,   For now.   Here are some pictures.    They turned out pretty darn cute though.       These are "moca muffins"

No Recipe: Coffee Cake w\ Moca Frosting!

 

I'll  post the recipes later.

My love

❤     I get to see my love in 16 days!!!      ❤  

❤                                                   ❤

cheesey potato slices

Here, I sliced potatoes thinly in rounds,   put them in a zippy bag with extra virgin olive oil.    got them all covered in that,   Then I sprinkled fresh finally chopped parsley,  kosher salt and black pepper.   made sure each potato was coated with that.    Baked them at 390º   then a few minutes before they where completely heavenly I sprinkled them liberally with monterey jack cheese.    Then put them on one shelf higher.   put the oven on broil.      And waited until the potatoes were completely perfect, the cheese was melted and lightly browning in some areas.    Okay so I dont know why cheddar is considered the best cheese for potatoes! No no.. monterey jack cheese is def the best by far.. no argument there.    Their individual flavors compliment each other perfectly!  and its simply amazing....  

Readin'

So lately the last two or three months.   I've been reading a looot of books.      I read one in particular that I really enjoyed called "tilly" the book was based on the situation of a lady and her husband who had had a abortion and 10 years  later the lady was still dealing with depression and guilt issues affecting her and her family.    Its about how she learned of forgiveness through the Cross and how to apply that to her situation and move past it.   And it gives  a perspective from the child\tilly from heaven  that she aborted.      Coming to her mother in a "Dream" and telling her she had forgiven her but just wished so much that she could be with her and her dad and older siblings.    The book mainly told of Gods great love and forgiveness,  it could be applied to any situation but was pointed towards guilt, and esp guilt with abortion.    It was a amazing  book.    The  other one that I've read that I really loved was "Wounded Spirit"   That book was using the Authors negative schooling experiences from grade school until high school,  that mostly took place due too:   physical deformities and other differences and being  a Christian,    the book showed very much how to deal with being a wounded spirit and finding peace and worth in God.   And it explains how that works,  and how teasing and taunting can hurt someone so deeply and can go on to affect them much much later in life and they're self perspective(s)    And it also showed how to ask forgiveness from God and the wounded for those who have been the wounders and to go on leading a different life.     I loved that one too,   Some other books I've been reading are:  "Piercing the darkness"  -  the second book to "this present darkness"   I also have a smaller  book that  I usually read a page or so a day out of called "for the love of children"  Each page will have a little quote,  often a small story of a child.   And encouragement \ wisdom in relating to children and loving them.   Its pretty good,  one of the other books I've been reading is  "sinner"    Although I haven't gotten very far with that one,  its harder for me to get in to his books,   but I always end up enjoying them after-wards   -   well usually;  there was one I didn't like very well.   I'm also reading another one of his books called "White" part of the black, red, white, green trilogy I really like those ones,  but they are easier for me to put down hence the long time it has taken me to read the series.     I finished one of my favorites "nightmare academy"  a month or so ago,   it was awesome,  it'd take to long to explain.  -   the nutshell though is,   its trying to--did show how a life without morals   i.e nothing  set just whatever,  nothing is for sure or right,   Whatever you want to be right is right.  will never work and unfortunately make you go insane.  :P    And I've also started reading the Cooper kids adventure series.   hehe.     I've finished the first one and most of the second one.    And I've been doing my usual reading of my cooking magazines,   "everyday cooking,  better homes and gardens, food everyday, fine cooking etc"   and my other random magazines I enjoy "good things" etc.      And I usually read one of my cook books through two or three times a week,  Ive been reading "the pioneer woman cooks, and in the sweet kitchen"  and also " The elements of cooking" Which so far is good and seems to be more of a facts of cooking in particular subjects then a 'this is how  you do it book'   so its nice,    And it has somewhat gone into mild detail of a few things where it will explain why  its like that.  Which is ....fun, mostly sometimes its like.. "uhh cool?   Things melt cause it got hot,   never woulda guessed"  But overall I'm enjoying it.   My brother asked me very disturbed how I knew so much about random things.   ( I really dont, he was just being flatterful.. Is that a word? :P )    We were talking about the Mayan sacrificing practices    And my usual stutter\uhh uhh uhh bug self attempted to answer " I don't know " but someone else said " Cause she reads ALLLLL the time"   I thought it was kinda funny,  I didn't realize how much I read until  I got to thinking about it.    The only sad thing is out of however many hours I spend reading a day, week, month, year.. its a smaller percentage of time with the Bible then with a food book or a novel.... :\  Bad on me.

Pillow bread

I  made pillow bread,  Tuesday.  -    but it was very "special" pillow bread because I didn't put the yeast in til the very last minute.   As in right  before I let it rise.   ( This isn't a good idea,   I just forgot to put it in earlier )    One half of the dough I used right away to make my bread.   Let it rise then baked it.  - the other half I put in a ziplock baggy and refrigerated it for 24 hours,  Just to see what it would do and I didn't need all of it that one day.     -   Well the next day.   I guess my  bag wasn't big enough because it was spilling out.   of a not zipped anymore bag.   :p so it rose alot!    Then I let it do its other rising after being shaped and then baked it.   And that one was MUCH MUCH happier and fluffy.   

This is the first one though:  

 

yummy!  

  no, I didn't wait til it cooled completely!! who does?

This is a random little dish I made up today,    I got inspired by "Pico de gallo"  -  A dish I always make to go with burritos and tacos and such,     And another dish I saw in a cook book ( The accidental country girl )  that actually had eggs in it.   Which I obviously left out ( Not much of a fan of eggs )    out of those three different things,   this is what happened: 

 

it was actually really tasty.   :) I fried the tortilla chips in oil before adding them to the veggies.   The flavorings are lemon, salt&pepper, cilantro and red wine vinegar. 

This is a picture that I made from a bite of my eclair cake: 

26 days.

its 26 days to the offical start of my summer.   May 8th.   Which btw is a Saturday if you were wondering.   :) its when my boyfriend gets home. :)


Saturday,   made eclair cake.   :)    I layered a pan with graham crackers,   poured over some yummy vanilla pudding more graham crackers more pudding,   then topped it off with a yummy chocolate frosting.    Let it chill in the frig for 24 hours.    And then took it to discipleship on sunday evening ( Which is my Sunday night meet with my girlfriends to read\discuss the bible and have prayer requests and tell about our weeks, and how we are doing in various things )    It turned out pretty much amazing.. it all got eaten... and ya. :) I loved it.   my only complaint was according to the recipe I followed the chocolate frosting was pretty dang rich.. Although so is vanilla pudding so it kinda needed to be strong to get its distinct chocolate flavor in each bite.   -   And, the more I ate it.   The  more comfortable I got with the richness and found it actually tasted really good that way.   But still so I think you could maybe subtract a tbs or so of cocoa.
1 box Graham crackers.
2 (3 1/4 ounce)  boxes instand french vanilla pudding.
3 1/2 c milk
1 (7 ounce) container whipped cream.   Plus a c or so more.
frosting
1 1/2 c's powdered sugar
1/2 c cocoa
2 tbs butter - softened
2 tsp pure vanilla extract
2 tsp light corn syrup (  I didn't add this,  because I didn't have any but I'm sure it would be fine with it )

-   For the frosting:  beat together with a stand mixture or whisk.  the sugar and butter add the cocoa then the vanilla extract and syrup.    beat til everything is well combined and smooth.
for the pudding filling:
follow the directions on the pudding boxes for making the pudding only use 3 1/2 cups milk instead of 4.   then add the whipped cream\topping to that.   Butter  the bottom of a 13by 9 by 2 inch pan line with graham crackers,  pour half of the vanilla mixture over.   cover with more graham crackers,  Pour rest of pudding mixture over.  -  Cover with frosting.  Chill in the frig for 24 hours.  dont heat up!

 this isn't a very good picture, you can't really see the layers in it but oh well.


Oooooo!  New picture,  With a little whip cream:

And I also made a delicious healthy snack. :D a trail mix. :) with chocolate covered raisins, cranberries,  ginger slices, banana chips, and nuts. :)

...Summer.. is ...close..

I haven't wrote in a wile.  So, the  last four days I've been *enjoying* a cold.   stuffed up, runny nose, headache lack of sleep all that nasty stuff.    But I'm slowly over the past two days starting to feel better so. :)   One thing that is helping the "feeling better process" along quite well  -  is my overwhelming excitement and anxiousness for summer to start for several reasons.  Unlike most winters.   I'm tii...re *ducks flying tomatoes* ddd of the snow and cold and darkness.   Usually it doesn't bug me and I didn't realize how tired I was of seeing it til it started slowly going away,  And the sun started coming  back.   Its sunny out. :) I actually got excited this year when sun rays started hitting the peeks of the trees - usually im like .. cool, sun.. ya whatever. this year I was like yay!!!!  now its moved on to the ground and is helping along with my prayers the ever so large amount of white fluff to slowly disappear.   In the woods under some of the trees and where the sun is reaching the best there's dry spots already. :)  i can see old dead leaves and twigs and fallen logs  and raspberry plants and rose hip plants.   -  Heh, I want to go sit on it and sun tan.   In town in the parking lots and on some of the roads its pretty much completely dry. :)  -  I have little crystals in my room hanging from the top of my window I think they might actually start reflecting sometime soon, which would make me very happy.  Yesterday I wore a pair of "off road Crocs" and shorts to town with a three fourth'ths sleeved cute flannel with a tank top underneath to Church,    And I didn't freeze and to my boyfriends worry my "cute little toes,  that could possibly get so cold that when I whack them they could shatter off"  are still intact. :)     Not only am I looking forward to the much warmer, brighter weather.   I'm so excited about summer in general:   Summer night storms ( I love those!! ) Rain,  water fights swimming.. Paintballing, :)   Going on walks,   going to McCarthy. :) very excited about that.   making ice cream.  - Which just isn't as fun to make in the winter time I'm excited to see dirt.. I love dirt.   esp, when its warm.. :) heh,   mmm.     And there's something about summer that seems to make it okay to stay out later..  Prolly the light thing.    But its just so much fun to be out really late at night when its just dimming and its slightly breezy and the sky is turning that  beautiful pink and red and oranges it does. with the sun just bearly peeking through.    :) Although The thing that I'm most excited about though is: Lee coming home. <3  I'm actually more excited this year then the very first year that we got together - not to be cheesey or anything.  but its sooooo exciting! We'll gonna do so much together and have so much fun. :)   And its gonna be 100% amazing. :)  36 days til he gets here. :)  ya. :)  Oh yeah,  and I made a chicken veggie soup the other day, and I also make mazto ball soup ( Which is prolly one of my favorite soups ) But anyways.  I don't have pictures of either. - yet,  I might get a picture of the mazto ball soup later.   So,  ya. :) bye  

Donuts.

So, I wrote about coffee its only a given to write about donuts.   Right?  
So, the begining of February I started a "No sugar, limited carb and no diary" Diet.   Right around the same time my dad asked me to make him donuts.   Now,  I don't know about you but its very difficult for me to cook anything without trying it.   The curiousness is torture.   Not to mention I'm a _taste_as_I_cook_along type of girl.    So, I  didn't end up making them until the end of February-Start of March.   So  here they are.   Their raising donuts,  not to sweet though - just perfect. :)   With a somewhat lemony  glaze.   They'll always a big hit. :)   I got the recipe from my boyfriend's ( Lee! <3 ) mom: Renee'.    :)   Their amazing!

    

Frappuccino

So,   I love coffee.   It started out as my brothers girlfriend getting me to buy a white chocolate moca at my church.  in which I decided to add hazel nut too.   It was really good.   I liked the slight coffee flavor in it.   it wasn't over whelming.   it only had one shot,  I believe.  (   I liked coffee before with lots of creamer\milk and sugar and flavoring so the coffee in its self was more like a flavoring in hot chocolate or milk :P ) But now,  after that  - I've tried lots of different types of coffees, flavorings, mixtures, roastings and blends.  And up to 6 shots of espresso.  I really like it. :)  Infact, I often drink just plain coffee without anything added if the coffee has a good taste,  There's some coffees that where poorly made or stored funky and really don't taste all that amazing but if its a properly processed and roasted and stored coffee its quite enjoyable. :)   So, today  I decided to copy one of my friends (Lindsey Proctor) coffee treat she made from a recipe online.   Its a home_made_in_a_jar frappuccino.  I changed the recipe around slightly to fit my taste but pretty much used the same recipe and it turned out wonderfully and was really fun and fast to make,   Heres a picture ( or two! :D )  >

 

Heres the one I made. :) I used hazel nut syrup in mine, and I also used powdered sugar instead of  "packet of splenda"  

  

Top view. :) Of all the yummies.  

• ¾ cups Brewed Strong Coffee, Room Temperature  ( if its not to room temp, like you just brewed it,  Like me.   You could just stick it in the frigs or freezers for a bit.  It'd chill faster if you only chilled the 3/4s of  a cup too,   And not all of it. )
• ¾ cups Milk
• 1 package Sweetener, A Single Serve Packet, Your Choice  ----- This is where I used about a tbs of powdered sugar which worked quite well,  I don't -  repeat,  I highly don't recommend using granulated sugar, it wont dissolve properly and it will ruin  your coffee. :( 
• 2 Tablespoons Chocolate Syrup
• 2 Tablespoons Liquid Coffee Creamer, Your Flavor Of Choice -- also, I just used a plain  "Torani"  syrups,   I used hazel nut.   And, it worked fine even being less thick.
• 3 whole Ice Cubes

Preparation Instructions

In a 16 oz. Mason jar, put all your ingredients followed with the ice cubes. Put the lid and ring on and shake, shake, shake!
Taste it. Does it need a little more sweetener?
I don’t like mine horribly sweet, so I stick with one packet of Splenda. The creamer and chocolate syrup add the rest of the sugar to sweeten.
As for the creamer, I used Coffeemate Italian Sweet Cream. It’s nondescript, sweet and creamy and lets the coffee and chocolate shine through.
But, if you like hazelnut or coconut cream, go for it!
At this point, you can drink it right out of the jar or pour it over crushed ice and top with whipped cream and drizzle more chocolate for an authentic coffee house experience.

I need you now.

I'm sure you've heard the song " Need you now" by Lady Antebellum.   From listening to the song, I'm assuming that its about a couple who broke up but secretly still love\need each other.  Now, when I listen to that song though .. for some reason the lyrics " Its a quarter after one, I'm all alone and I need you now"  really speak to me,  How I am\feel now for the last several years.   True,   I can also relate to the song since I'm in a relationship with a man who lives thousands of miles away and I often feel like that,  since we'll apart a lot.   But, the first thing I think when I hear that song.  -  And the first time I heard it was yesterday, Then again that  night when I was trying to go to sleep is:  We need Jesus,  I need Jesus.  I mean really.. who else is gonna fulfill us forever and make us happy? - Who is gonna be there when " its a quarter after one, I'm all alone "  Even the best boyfriend in the world ( Okay, I'm biased.  but you get the point ) Isn't there. .  Yes, I could call him like in the song and frankly I wanted too,   Infact I had just gotten off the phone with him a few hours ago.  And I wanted to call him back. . but he was sleeping,  Because when we'll all alone and need someone.   We seem to automatically look to a human,  rather its a sibling, a friend, a parent, a spouse or your lover.   Because its so much easier they are there.  You can hear, feel and see them.  Its usually instant, even if your on the phone or w\e.  Its instant.  You instantly feel not alone and better.   But,  I think God wants us to first look to him.  And I don't think he wants us to have to "wait" to feel in his presence.   wether or not your in some awesome spiritual moment or not.   Your always in his presence.   " I will never leave you,  Nor forsake you"  Hes always there,  Always.  Rather we feel him or not.   Last night,  even though I fell asleep wishing that I could feel him there 'more'  he was still there.   He wasn't ignoring me, he wasn't to tired to be with me.  Or gone, or at work or doing homework.   He was there,  he's always there and never to busy for us.   ( Think about it for a minute, its awesome! ) so when we'll all alone.   He's always there.  always waiting to make us not alone.   And, We always need him now.  And he wants us too need him.   Its not like he gets tired of us,  he delights in our clingy-ness.   I often feel towards God like:    " And I wonder if I ever cross your mind"   

Psalm 139:1-3 - O Lord, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar, you discern my going out and my lying down, you are familiar with all my ways. (NIV)  So yeah, we cross his mind.  Duh.  = )

P.s. I dont think theres anything wrong with, with needing people too, or getting comfort from them, and curing your loneliness, etc.  Cause God made us to dwell together and need each other,  We just need our ultimate fulfillment from God. <3

                              "  And I don't know how I can do without,  I just need you now "  

First blog post

So... This is my first post, I guess I can write about my new toy.  :)
I got after so-very-long its a Kitchen Aid stand mixer,  Professional.  Its 475 watts. ( Powerful ) its so nice, its white.  It has a dough hook, a flat  beater and a wire whisk, and I plan to get more attachments for it.   Right  now I really want the shredder\slicer that attaches to the hub,  the meat grinder and the ice tray.  ( For making ice cream )

This is the first time I used it,  I made Challah. "Hal-La"

 

And "Hal-La" is yummy . = )